Tuesday, January 15, 2008

damn the new york times

Mid-life Crisis
read that.

I feel like I'm in store for a heavy mid-life crisis. It's just so "me".

"Popularly viewed as a unique developmental birthright of the human species, it supposedly strikes when most of us have finally figured ourselves out — only to discover that we have lost our youth and mortality is on the horizon."
I can totally see myself in like 20-25 years, finally have my shit worked out, look in the mirror and freak out that I'm no longer 22. I'll examine my life with a fine tooth comb and declare I've "done nothing". Every accomplishment will be insignificant in comparison to life I thought I would live; the Great Life I dreamed of as a idealistic youth. There will surely be a scene where I fall to my knees, break down and sob, shout out to the heavens and proclaim "WHY LORD? WHY?" "I've only just begun to LIVE!" (cue epic soundtrack and celine dion or whoever sang that song).

I already kinda had a 1/4 life crisis. When I turned 20 I totally freaked; seriously. I was home for the summer between sophomore and junior year. Right on July 7 I started freaking out, thinking I had some horrible disease. I turned into a slight hypochondriac. I couldn't believe I was 20. I was the baby of the family; babies aren't 20! Needless to say, it was quite a stressful experience. I eventually though got over it. Realized I was being silly and swung into junior year as a confident new 20 year old.

But this whole thing has got me thinking. If I reacted like I did to my passage from teen life to adult hood, how am I going to react when I pass into middle age? I freaked out at a moment in life most kids cannot wait to get to! How am I going to react when I enter the first days of my golden years?! Many elderly people say the best years of their life were after middle-age. So why all the fuss? The article cites a youth obsessed culture, and in part I agree with the author. I know I'm pretty youth obsessed. Hell! I'm only 22 and I'm writing about how my mid-life crisis is just around the corner!

Who knows, maybe it does come down to the fact that I might be a raving narcissist. Or it might be that I think too much. Or it might happen that by the time I get to my 40s I will have grown enough to handle feeling a little old. Or it might be nothing...

I've often quoted the once great Garth Brooks "I'm much too young to feel this damn old."

This is all of course assuming I make it past 26.
....at the most!




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oh...and another thing i realized today: women=bullets

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